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View Full Version : Update on our day with Baxter (our cat) - long post!



directmailscrapper
05-25-2007, 10:40 PM
My husband was off today and I took the day off. We got Emily to school. We had an 11:00 appointment to have our 15-year old cat Baxter put down -- he has been suffering from kidney failure for months and we realized that it was time. We weren't sure how to tell Emily -- and you guys gave us such wonderful, thoughtful and caring advice last night!

The Vet was wonderful (he's a friend, we knew he would be) and Baxter went peacefully. Both of us cried, and we decided to have him cremated and have his ashes returned to us. (extravagant, I know, but it seemed like the right thing to do).

Then Richard and I went out for lunch, ran some errands, came home. I got to play with paper and stamps for a little while, then we went to pick Emily up from school. It was probably the only time BOTH of us have picked her up together. We let her chatter about her day on the way home and then we sat on the front porch and told her what happened.

We had decided to go with a "hybrid" approach. We told her that Baxter had taken a turn for the worse in the morning and that we took him to the Vet and the Vet told us that it was time. We agreed that we didn't want him to suffer and so we had him put to sleep.

She cried, but she handled it very well. She didn't ask any questions. Eventually, we decided to join some friends at the pool and invited a friend to spend the night.

At this point, I'd have to say that everything went better than I could have expected. Emily was very sad but also very grown up. I'm sure that there will be many sad days ahead, but I think we did the right thing in how we handled it. You guys were a BIG help in helping us figure out what to tell her and how to handle it! Thank you!

I had my husband read all of your kind suggestions and warm regards, and he cried. You guys are amazing. Thank you for your words, thoughts and prayers.

There have been so many very sad posts lately, losing a cat almost seems trivial. It's hard to keep life in prospective sometimes!

I love you guys! Thanks! XXOO Nancy

maxiesmom
05-25-2007, 10:45 PM
Baxter was a part of your family for a very long time. For those of us that have no children, losing a pet IS losing a family member. I know, we lost our 3 dogs over a 5 year span. Hugs and prayers for you and Emily.

hutchink
05-25-2007, 11:07 PM
Nancy,

So sorry to hear about Baxter! I'm really glad that Emily took it pretty well! I will continue to pray for you all...hope the days ahead are not to hard on you all!

XXOOXX,
K

cindi
05-25-2007, 11:14 PM
Sounds like you & dh handled Baxters passing beautifully.
It's good that you went together , it's a sad thing but to share the burden is very special.
It seems Baxters passing was very dignified, ..what more could anyone want.
Bless your DD for handling this like a little trooper, unfortunatly it's one of lifes saddest lessons..byt neccisary.
Big hugs to you & your family And I'll be sure to say a prayer for Baxter to be happy in heaven.
:nod:

lisaguyon
05-25-2007, 11:18 PM
nancy-

I am so sorry for your loss. I am sending hugs your way and prayers up for your family. Losing a pet is like losing a family member especially as long as you have ahd Baxter.

My mother too had her dog, Noodles, creamated. He is in her night stand and I am under strict instructions that he is to be buried with her.

HUGS

lisa

hbpuppy
05-26-2007, 12:15 AM
I am so sorry Nancy. I know how hard it can be to say bye to a pet. It totally sucks. I'm glad that your hubby was there for you. I know you are going to miss that little guy.

iloveflipflops
05-26-2007, 02:54 AM
I'm sorry to hear about Baxter but it sounds like you and your husband handled it perfectly. Sorry for Emily too. Its all very sad.

ccstampin12
05-26-2007, 08:02 AM
Nancy, so sorry for your sadness. Losing a pet is a big one, IMO.
Hoping you and your family can keep busy and try not to dwell on your loss.
HUGS and prayers.
Joanie

gigibee
05-26-2007, 08:15 AM
So sorry about Baxter and I know the feelings you are experiencing. We had to have our Maddie (standard schnauzer) put down last Aug. She would have been 15 in Sept. We brought her ashes home too and put her in her favorite spot in the backyard. It will be sad for all of you, but it sounds like you handled the situation wonderfully with Emily. Take care and keeping all in my prayers.

Konnie

JBgreendawn
05-26-2007, 10:29 AM
Nancy,
I am very sorry for your family's loss but, losing a family member (even a furbaby) is not trivial in my mind...

{{{ HUGS }}}

LinzyD
05-26-2007, 10:32 AM
I'm so sorry for your family's loss, Nancy. At least you can take comfort in knowing that Baxter is no longer in pain and is resting peacefully.
L

Paula Carden
05-26-2007, 10:36 AM
Sounds like Baxter had a great life-but still it is hard to give up a pet.
Emily sounds very mature and she is lucky to have parents that care about her and her cat. Pets leave their pawprints on our hearts forever and Baxter will not be forgotten.
Thinking of you!

mjbonoan
05-26-2007, 11:19 AM
Oh Nancy, I'm terribly sorry about Baxter. Losing a pet can be very traumatic regardless of the circumstances.

Give Emily my condolences also, she handled it very well, or should I say much better than I did just thinking that I might have to put my Rowdy down. (By the way, he's much better now!)

((hugs to all of you))

MJ

GrammaStamper
05-26-2007, 11:24 AM
Nancy, I'm so sorry for your family. It's so difficult. Healing takes time, but it does happen.

buggainok
05-26-2007, 01:34 PM
Nancy,

So sorry about Baxter. I'm proud of how you and dh handled the whole thing with Emily. And proud of her for being so grown-up about a sad life lesson we all must learn, and keep learning.

I'm a grandma now, and still remember losing pets as a child. My parents were animal lovers and very sensitive to my feelings, which made all the difference.

Baxter was a lucky kitty to have such a loving family.

MyRnAbS
05-26-2007, 06:53 PM
I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending prayers your way!

ellie
05-27-2007, 12:00 AM
Nancy, I am so sorry about Baxter. I know how hard it is as I have gone through that with our dog. I think you did everything exactly right. Emily is blessed to have such caring parents.
After a bit, maybe she would like a picture of Baxter in a frame that she could keep in her room. Sometimes, on sad days, it helps to remember how happy her cat was.

Firecracker
05-27-2007, 12:07 AM
Nancy,

I am so sorry about Baxter. Reading your post made me cry. Animals are family. I'm sending my hugs your way. Hugs, Heather

teabear
05-27-2007, 05:18 AM
What a beautiful story of a sad time. You all handled Baxter's passing with dignity and love. Hugs all around.

Christie
05-27-2007, 12:48 PM
Nancy, reading your story made me cry. I'm so sorry you had to put your kitty down but it was for the best. I'm so proud of your dd also. I'm glad she took the news well and was very grown up about it. I think you all should make a scrapbook of Baxter, it can be very healing to sit and think of the fun times you had with him.

stampinmom3
05-27-2007, 12:52 PM
I really feel for your family. It is soooo sad loosing a fur baby. Our family has loved and lost our precious dalmatians, and they are still in my heart everyday. We had our female cremated and she is in beautiful ornate box with a beautiful poem from the vet, that they stamped her paw print on . Oh, my that was a tear jerker. I understand your grief and hope that the fun memories with your kitty will help you through these sad times.