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View Full Version : My stomach is in KNOTS!!!



suzi_f
02-26-2009, 02:43 PM
I'm leaving here in a bit to pick up the kids, drop off those that are not mine to get to the dentist's office by 3pm for our 3:20 appts. Then, I will sit in the car & wait for IDES to call me re my unemployment! I'm sooooo nervous. I don't know what I'm supposed to tell them. Do I go into detail? Do I just tell them I was baited into a shouting match? Do I tell them about the previous days "incident"??? Do I wait for them to ask me or do I volunteer info about the "profaninty"??? I just wish this was OVER!!!

I still don't have my stuff back! Charissa was supposed to call me back LAST MONDAY and didn't. I talked to Vicci (the manager) and she was gonna call Charissa. I called Vicci again & she hadn't had the chance to (Vicci moved last weekend & is moving her mother into asst living -- her plate is FULL & she doesn't need my problems compounding hers). DH is mad 'cause I still don't have my things (nothing important, just the principal of it!) I want to throw up!!!

Wish me luck!!!

Vintagegal
02-26-2009, 02:49 PM
I'm leaving here in a bit to pick up the kids, drop off those that are not mine to get to the dentist's office by 3pm for our 3:20 appts. Then, I will sit in the car & wait for IDES to call me re my unemployment! I'm sooooo nervous. I don't know what I'm supposed to tell them. Do I go into detail? Do I just tell them I was baited into a shouting match? Do I tell them about the previous days "incident"??? Do I wait for them to ask me or do I volunteer info about the "profaninty"??? I just wish this was OVER!!!

Wish me luck!!!

Be honest with them. Let the interviewer know how much you regretted what happened. They will be blunt with you and ask you outright the circumstances which led to your dismissal. Don't get defensive. Just let them know that you felt you were being attacked, and you regret that you were provoked into defending yourself. You let them know that if you could do it all over again, you would've made better choices. Also, let them know that you had a clean record prior to that shouting match, and you felt that the district did not give you an opportunity to correct the behavior. Instead, the district decided to just fire you, even though you profusely apologized. Don't overthink it. Just be honest. Good luck, and let us know how it goes.

cindi
02-26-2009, 03:25 PM
I agree with Ethels advice, it's the best way to go. I wish I could come give you a big hug., I hate nerve wracking crap!
They have to let you get your stuff, what the heck is taking so long?

Far North
02-26-2009, 03:33 PM
In the states where I have worked employees who are released from their employment are granted unemployment. I would recommend listening carefully to the questions and responding specifically to it. They will ask for more details if needed.
Take several very deep breathes and relax.

teabear
02-26-2009, 03:39 PM
Treat it like you were on a witness stand in court. Answer only what you are asked and offer nothing additional.

Vintagegal
02-26-2009, 03:47 PM
What you have to remember, also, is they are also going to gather information from the school (if they haven't already).

Mrs. Fence
02-26-2009, 03:51 PM
Big hugs for you, Suzi! I hope you get answers soon, and can put this all behind you.

My3Ds
02-26-2009, 03:55 PM
Good luck. I would offer only the info that they ask for. If they ask if you have anyt thing to say, just let them know how you regret what happened (w/out detail unless they ask). As for your things, I would go to the school in the morning. Ask for an administrator to go with you to the cafeteria to get your things! Don't play phone tag with them. Just go in and nicely state that you are there for your personal property.

Far North
02-26-2009, 04:23 PM
I guess the rules are quite a bit different from state to state because generally my contact with unemployment office as an employer was only receiving a 1/2 page form. It said the briefest of facts-the date of termination, reason for termination-in a brief phase and a legal statement that generally said if as the employer I terminated the employee they would receive unemployment. I would sign and that was it as an employer. I was provided an opportunity for a hearing if I so requested (but the 1 time I did that it was only a phone call and they repeated the law and they did not want to hear my side of the story.)

Yes, the school should have promptly released your personal items to you. I too would recomend doing it tomorrow, after a courtesy voice mail message telling the head adminstrator that you will be there at a specific time to pick them up.

shadoob
02-26-2009, 06:42 PM
Oh Suzi...what a mess....I agree that you should go to school to get your stuff with an administrator....just play dumb about it.

As for the forms and people you have to deal with..be honest but only offer so much....and....as you already know...BE PLEASANT above all. The people you are dealing with have to deal wtih depressed angry people every single day...they will remember you and want to help you if you are polite and funny and sincere....all of which you are! Sometimes it's a matter of not getting your form stuck on someone's desk... hugs!!!

suzi_f
02-26-2009, 07:10 PM
The "ordeal" was much easier than I thought it would be. The guy that called was really, really nice. This means either one of 2 things: he is nice & believes me & will make sure I get my benefits or B) he was lulling me into thinking he was nice so I would let my guard down & tell him all my dirty little secrets.

He asked questions. I tried to answer them w/short & sweet answers but I tend to ramble when I'm nervous. He would say things like "little things blow up & out of control" and "sometimes things happen that are out of your control". Made me think that he understands that this was just one of those things. He was impressed w/the fact that I had been there 6 years and seemed genuinely suprised that they would fire me over a fight w/a employee of only 3 weeks. I explained that I had no idea I could be fired for "fighting" and that I had never before seen anyone fired for either profanity or fighting. I told him I was very sorry the situation had turned out like it had & would give anything to do it all over again.

The only thing that spooked me was the final question: how did my actions effect my employer. I should have said "I don't know" but, honest Suzi doesn't keep her mouth shut. EVER!! And I told him that the principal was upset over the situation & that Aramark has to keep the principals happy to make sure they keep thier contract w/the district.

Overall, I think it was ok & I really think I'll get my benefits. I hope that I've learned something about this situation: not to talk so much & not to get so nervous!!!

I really, Really, REALLY appreciate all of you & how supportive you've been. I wish I could give you all real hugs!!! Thanks so much for being there for me!!! I couldn't have done it w/o you!!!!

Vintagegal
02-26-2009, 07:14 PM
Suzi....my gut feeling tells me you will get your benefits.

cindi
02-26-2009, 07:15 PM
sounds like it went well Suzi. I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for you
:)

lakeslady
02-26-2009, 07:20 PM
Those benefits will be heading your way, think positive Suzi

scrappinnuts
02-26-2009, 08:46 PM
I think your answer to the last questions was great...and honest... I think you will be getting your benefits.

Paula Carden
02-27-2009, 06:43 AM
Thinking of you! I agree with Jan about your things, tell them when you are coming and if that isn't a good time have them suggest a time.
We always either have the employees things gathered for them before their dismissal or someone helps them at the time they are dismissed. I have never told anyone over the phone to not come back. We always have them come in and if possible gather their things or assist them. But grievence and dismissal is different from state to state and agency to agency. We are a public agency, not private.
I personally would only answer what the interviewer ask from the the employment security-same as when they contact me about employee. Usually in our county a phone conference hearing is set up with the employee, employment security and county dept head and this gives the employee a chance to rebuttal what is being said etc...

Thinking of you!!

mydogstinks2
02-27-2009, 07:56 AM
I'm glad that it went better than you thought it would.

suzi_f
02-27-2009, 12:12 PM
I HAVE MY STUFF!!! I called the school today, told Vicci I was coming in TODAY. She said fine. I got my stuff, said goodbye to everyone & am DONE!!! Whew!! Closure, baby! It feels good!

Vintagegal
02-27-2009, 12:26 PM
I HAVE MY STUFF!!! I called the school today, told Vicci I was coming in TODAY. She said fine. I got my stuff, said goodbye to everyone & am DONE!!! Whew!! Closure, baby! It feels good!

Good deal! Time to move on and start fresh!

teabear
02-27-2009, 02:26 PM
Glad that is all behind you now, Suzi. Here's to a bright tomorrow. How soon will you know the decision for unemployment?

ctinyjoy
02-27-2009, 03:55 PM
Suzi....I am glad that you have your personal items back. Here in FL , most everyone gets unemployment unless you were terminated for willful misconduct. I don't think fighting is considered willful misconduct. I hope you hear something soon. The turnaround time here is 3-4 days.