Need some help ...

[Darleneh710]

How do you ask someone if they are married or single without sounding like you are interested in them?

I have been chatting via fb with a friend from HS and he didn't mention if he is single or married, just that he doesn't have a family yet. I don't know how to perceive this as...So, I was wondering how to ask if he has someone in his life without making it look like I am interested...I mean, of course I'm interested but...you know what I mean? I don't want to be obvious you know LOL

Also, on his status he didn't put anything...so it doesn't say if he is single or married or anything like that.

Please tell me what you think soon! I am in the middle of sending him a msg to ask him. Yes, I know this sounds crazy...lol

Thanks!

[Patty]

I think I would say "tell me about your family". See what his answer is.

[pesc]

HUm... I would try the way family... because if for him family is being with someone or having kids... You could play the dumb card and ask him ... I've got a friend who is talking about having a family since she is with her boyfriend/husband... I find that strange... what about the meaning of having a family for you?

I was kinda of good asking without doing it...

If you allowed me to share, I've meet my husband on internet... but I've learned something along the way... speaking with someone (on the phone) as soon as possible let you know sooner if it's going somewhere. Good luck with it all!

[maxiesmom]

I like Patty's answer. Or if there's some topic you could always ask, how does your wife feel about this. Like you just assumed he was married and then oh gee, I didn't know.

[Darleneh710]

I like Patty's answer. Or if there's some topic you could always ask, how does your wife feel about this. Like you just assumed he was married and then oh gee, I didn't know.

That's what I was thinking of doing...just asking him if him and his wife were planning on having kids or maybe some other topic like you suggested..that way he would most likely clear it up for me right?

Thanks ladies!

Thank you Pesc...for sharing your story of how you met your husband..I always love hearing those kinds of stories:)

[maxiesmom]

Let us know what he says!!

[pesc]

I like the idea of assuming he has a wife... you will know for sure after that!

[cindi]

ya Darlene, let us know. You could say, so whta are you and your wife doing for the holidays?
:)

[Darleneh710]

ya Darlene, let us know. You could say, so whta are you and your wife doing for the holidays?
:)

Ooh! I like that one, Cindi! Thanks! I think I am going to use if ya don't mind...and then we'll see! How exciting! lol

Thanks again! Definitely keep you girls posted!

[cindi]

Ooh! I like that one, Cindi! Thanks! I think I am going to use if ya don't mind...and then we'll see! How exciting! lol

Thanks again! Definitely keep you girls posted!


hahaha, use away and good luck
:)

[Darleneh710]

Ok, I just sent it off! Whew! I have been working on it for over an hr....my mom thinks I am crazy lol...I think it is funny! It's nice to feel all giddy and everything. I have a feeling that he isn't married though...only b/c I went on the classmates site the my class started a couple months ago and he just registered on there a few days ago and he didnt mention a family...but he should clear it all up for me..I just hope I didn't offend him lol..Yeah, this is me OVER THINKING it's what I do lol..

You should just ask my ex-bf..George lol..I analyze EVERYTHING lol

Thanks ladies...I hope he responds soon! I am anxious...but then again...maybe not too soon..if it's bad news right lol

Thanks again everyone for the input and suggestions! I love you guys!

[Darleneh710]

Good news! He is not married! I was going to wait until tomorrow to post this..but I couldn't wait lol.

Actually, I had logged off and was ready to go to bed and decided to check one last time to see if he responded and he did!

So, I will sleep good tonight! Thank you!

:notworthy:

[milmogando]

so u've established he's not married but i am still suspicious (...i just can't help it, sorry) the thing that rings alarm bells for me in the lack of 'single', 'married' or whatever in his FB profile. elusive makes me suspicous...although u know him from earlier and so would have a good idea of his character so u can trust that i suppose but 'not married' just doesn't cut it for me. sorry - i just have to play devils advocate - i would hate for you to be mislead.

[Christie]

Well now that you know it's time to make your next move!!! You better get his phone number!!!!

[Darleneh710]

Well now that you know it's time to make your next move!!! You better get his phone number!!!!

LOL...I know right? He does have his email addy in this profile...But right now we are just talking back and forth...his parents still live in the same town that I live in...so maybe I might be able to see him over the holidays...

[cindi]

how fun!! maybe you can ask if he wants to get together if he comes to his folks for the holiday
:)

[cindi]

let us know
:)

[Darleneh710]

That's funny Cindi... I was just going to ask to see him when he comes up to visit his folks this week...and was gonna ask if that was too forward to say..but I guess not if you suggested it right? lol

thanks:)

[pesc]

Ok, now that I've told you that I've meet my husband by internet... here is my "motherly" advices!!! If your phone number is in the phone book with your address and it's possible to trace you back with some engine from your phone number... don't give your phone number at first! Ask for his... hoping he is less cautious then you... but he is a guy so less risky for him then you. If you have to give him a phone number... use a cell phone, No street address with those most of the time. Oh I almost forgot... if you do call him, here we can do *67 and then our phone number this way it will not show your phone number on a caller ID or anything else and here it's free... but even if it's not it worth the money to stay safe.

If you do meet him, go it public places... Let someone know where you are going... and let him know also... it may strange a bit strange but well better safe then sorry!!! Oh, if you go from one place to another... everyone takes his own car...

Now that I have said all that... I did give my phone number to my now husband at one point... and I did went in a non public places after the first meeting... if you don't trust him ever it won't go far!!

I hope I don't sound too parano... Just want you to be safe while enjoying the trill of meeting someone intersting! Because it is sure exciting!

[Darleneh710]

Ok, now that I've told you that I've meet my husband by internet... here is my "motherly" advices!!! If your phone number is in the phone book with your address and it's possible to trace you back with some engine from your phone number... don't give your phone number at first! Ask for his... hoping he is less cautious then you... but he is a guy so less risky for him then you. If you have to give him a phone number... use a cell phone, No street address with those most of the time. Oh I almost forgot... if you do call him, here we can do *67 and then our phone number this way it will not show your phone number on a caller ID or anything else and here it's free... but even if it's not it worth the money to stay safe.

If you do meet him, go it public places... Let someone know where you are going... and let him know also... it may strange a bit strange but well better safe then sorry!!! Oh, if you go from one place to another... everyone takes his own car...

Now that I have said all that... I did give my phone number to my now husband at one point... and I did went in a non public places after the first meeting... if you don't trust him ever it won't go far!!

I hope I don't sound too parano... Just want you to be safe while enjoying the trill of meeting someone intersting! Because it is sure exciting!

I love it! Everything you said! Thanks so much for thinking of me! It means a lot! I love that you met your husband via the internet...one of my best girlfriends did as well...yrs ago..and they are happily married:)

I haven't heard anything yet...but hopefully will soon. I didn't ask for his number but maybe he will ask for mine! lol

[Darleneh710]

Ok...So I heard from him...and it seems he just might not be interested in anything more...He didn't say anything like that...just that he wouldn't be in town for long and that maybe next time he is in town...but not sure when that is and all that.

He must have wished me Happy Birthday 3 times in that PM! LOL

I just wanted to update you all on this, as you were all so interested:) But he doesnt seem to be...lol...But that's ok...I think the holidays makes me feel a little lonely because I am not with anyone...and once the new yr is here and I am feeling better (hopefully)...all will be well!

Merry Christmas!
&
Happy New Year
everyone!!!